Prenuptial Agreement: Pop The Question Without Scaring Off Your Fiance

Every married couple hopes for a happily ever after, but it doesn't always work out. No one wants to think about the possibility of divorce before they marry. It seems like you don't have faith in your relationship. Prenuptials protect your best interests. If you think a prenuptial agreement is right for you and leery about bringing it up, here are some tips to discuss the subject of prenuptial agreements:

Don't Wait

Talking about a prenuptial agreement over a romantic dinner days before the ceremony isn't ideal. Start the conversation six months before the wedding. It gives you a chance to prepare financially and allows everyone time to analyze their assets and voice concerns. Furthermore, a prenuptial agreement put together in under 30 days may be considered invalid or coercion.

Be Honest and Explain the Benefits

Explain to your fiance why you think this arrangement is important. Tell them your concerns about being financially-minded in case the marriage ends and you think it is in your best interest to keep some assets separated.

Discuss the benefit of '"risk aversion" even if you never divorce. Community property puts both of you at risk of losing more in the case of bankruptcy or lawsuits. If you have children from a previous marriage, express this concern, too.

Stay Calm

If you remain calm, your fiance will likely remain calm as well. Don't make demands and let your fiance state their side without being interrupted. Never hint at the idea you want this because you earn more.  If things get heated, delay it a day or two to calm down. Think about what caused this and reschedule.

Talk in Private

Getting a prenuptial agreement is a personal issue. Only talk about it with your fiance. There is no reason for anyone else to know.

Don't talk about it over dinner in a restaurant or public events. Furthermore, don't spring it on them. Inform your fiance'you have something important to talk over with them at a set time and a private place. 

Get a Mediator

An excellent way to start the discussion and keep it civil is pre-marital religious counseling. You would be less likely to argue in a religious setting. If you aren't undergoing pre-marital religious counseling, hire a mediator. A mediator can best explain the benefits and draw up an agreement to give your family lawyer that satisfies you and your fiance'.

These tips should help you ask for a prenuptial agreement without the risk of scaring your fiance' off. It is also advised you each hire your own attorney. Though two lawyers aren't required,  it looks better in court..


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